Friday, August 5, 2011

Gamegaddon: S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Shadow of Chernobyl

Breakfastman's Gamegaddon: S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Shadow of Chernobyl.
S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Shadow of Chernobyl is a semi-free roaming first person shooter/RPG hybrid from Ukrainian developer GSC Gameworld, mostly known for developing PC RTS's like the Cossacks series (which I have never played, but that is neither here nor there). The game's story and world are loosely based after a Russian film (also called Stalker), and on the Russian science fiction novel the film was loosely adapted from, Roadside Picnic.  The game itself was in development hell for over 4 years. It was originally supposed to be released in 2003. It was eventually released in early 2007. Despite that, the game managed to sell over 2 million copies around the world, and has become a cult classic with the PC gaming crowd (thanks in no small part to it's complexity and extreme difficulty). Is the game as good as many will lead you to believe? Is it really one of the best horror games of all time, like many claim? Let us dig in and find out. This is S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Shadow of Chernobyl.

 Um... You might want to move away from that burning barrel.... Nothing good every comes from burning barrels in shooters...
 
The game is your typical shooter affair. You can run, shoot, throw grenades, crouch, jump, lean around corners, the whole nine yards. Since this game is trying to be an open world game, you can approach most objectives however you want to, whether it be running in and shooting everywhere (protip: this is a terrible idea), sniping (and failing to hit much of anything) from a hill, trying to sneak past the enemies, or whatever else you can think of. The game does have some RPG elements to spice everything up though. The game has an inventory grid system sort of like the Diablo games, in addition to a weight limit like the Elder Scrolls or Fallout games (unlike those games, there is really no way to increase how much you can carry, weight wise. Well, I lie. There is one way, but it is only available at the end of the game, so yeah). You can go on side missions, join one of two factions, fight in an arena, buy various items, armor, and weapons from a couple vendors scattered throughout the game, and you can equip "accessories" (called artifacts here) to give yourself various buffs. You can also search the wilderness for "caches" (basically, hidden containers full of loot) that you find out about on dead bodies. All of this adds up to good, solid shooter experience with loads to do and experiment with. All of the weapons are fun, and there is a clear progression and sense of increasing power throughout the game, which I rather like. You start with nothing but a jacket and a 9mm, but by the end of the game, you are a walking tank, fully decked out with rare artifacts, powerful guns, and strong armor. That does make it disappointing that there was no freeplay after the campaign mode available in the retail release, but life is like that sometimes.

       Cool guys don't face the camera. They look behind their backs as a helicopter crashes in the distance.

The game has a large focus on realism in the minute to minute gameplay. Most of your guns are very inaccurate, it only takes a few bullets to kill you or the enemies, your guns and armor degrade with use, you weapons can jam, you have to deal with bleeding and radiation poisoning, you have to eat food every now and again, and you can only run for so long before you get tired and cannot walk anymore. This realism not only applies to what the player can do, but how the NPC's act. Friendly NPC's will insist you put your weapons away when you approach them, they will fight of bandits and monsters, and they will go to sleep at night. Heck, when some NPC's are gathered around a campfire, one of them occasionally whips out a guitar and starts playing some quite good music to pass the time. While some of these little touches adds nothing to the gameplay (like eating food, or the NPC's playing on guitars around the campfire), they really add to the atmosphere of the game.

           What happens when you neglect to take out the trash for weeks on end. Won't make that mistake again....

Speaking of atmosphere (/clever segway into next topic), this game has one of the most unique and immerse I have ever encountered in a game. The dilapidated buildings, horrifying monsters, ghostly visions, constantly overcast skies, gray-green color palette, and strange, mostly invisible traps (called anomalies) that dot the landscape all help to create this oppressive, dangerous atmosphere. You really get the feeling that everything is out to kill you. Most of the other NPC's (including the military), most of the animals, the earth and the air itself... All want to spill your blood. Heck, even the dead want a piece of the action (also: zombies that such guns = much more scary that regular zombies). Very few places are truly safe. I found myself running away from fights just as often as I got into them. It really is an incredible experience, wandering around the gameworld, trying to fend for your life against roaming packs of rabid dogs, while trying to avoid killing yourself in the anomalies.

Protip: Never let Cthulhu kiss you. It never, ever ends well. He tends to get all clingy and possessive after that, then cries when you try to break up with him... Just trust me on this, dating an Elder God never ends well..

I guess I have talked enough about gameplay, so it is time to start talking about the story. The basic premise goes as such: You are the Marked One, a Stalker who has lost his memory after he was left for dead in the center of "The Zone" a strange area surrounding the remains of the Chernobyl nuclear plant, which itself is surrounded by a mysterious energy field that supposedly melts the brains of whoever dares cross it. Your body was put on a "corpse truck", mysterious vehicles that come from the center of the Zone, carrying dead bodies for some unknown reason. Your body fell off the truck and was found by a local trader called Sidorovich. You were nursed back to health by him. The only clues you have to your past are a tattoo on your arm that says "S.T.A.L.K.E.R.", and a PDA which only contains one thing: an entry on a to-do list that says "Kill Strelok". The story follows the Marked One as he attempts to discover his identity and the identity of this "Strelok". You'll do various missions for various factions, enter into mysterious scientific labs, fight of the army, bandits, mercenaries, and other Stalkers. You will also learn of a mysterious object called "The Monolith", or "The Wish Machine" that supposedly resides in the middle of the Zone, behind a locked door in Chernobyl, and grants the wish of whoever can reach it, at the cost of extending the borders of the zone by 5 kilometers. The story itself is fairly good and has a few decent twists throughout. It is enough to keep you interested in what happens next. It is not without it's faults though. It relies on fetch quests far too often for my tastes, the characters don't really have much of a personality and generally all seem the same. Heck, I couldn't even tell you the names of any of the principal players in the game off the top of my head, besides the easy ones like "Strelok" and "Barkeep". Also, the main twist of the story (the truth about your identity) is incredibly obvious, and I had already guessed it correctly halfway through. It isn't all bad, and has some great moments, especially near the end. The game also has multiple endings, which is a nice bonus. All in all, decent enough, but not great. The atmosphere is more likely to bring you back than the story.

                                                       Willard:2099. Crispin Glover wishes he was this badass.


On the technical side of things, the game is pretty dated and glitchy. Weird shadow glitches appear way more often than the should, which is a shame, since the game really does have great lighting and shadow work. The textures of the game and models both look very dated, even by 2007 standards. I experienced one crash, and the game loads times can be rather long at times. The game also hitches up at odd times as well. Just running down a road can cause the occasionally dip in FPS for a second. The game also has a large number of glitches. Disappearing bodies, weapons, quest items, minimaps, player icons, the inability to drop weapons in your inventory if they have no ammo in them, the aforementioned strange shadow glitches, NPC's facing one way while bullets are firing in another... The list just goes on and on. Aesthetically, everything works, but if you are looking for a game that will wow you with it's graphics, look elsewhere. Luckily, there are some great mods out there that solve these problems, but if you plan to play the game vanilla, know that you will encounter many problems. Sound wise, the game is pretty good. The voice acting is fine, the sound effects all sound great and do what they are supposed to do, and the music is haunting and effecting. No problems there.

                                                                 Coolest. Backyard. Ever.

TL;DR: S.T.A.L.K.E.R. is probably one of the best shooters in years. While the story is only okay, the graphics are lackluster, and the game is rather glitchy, the game can be incredibly fun and offers a unique atmosphere not really found on anything else on the market. Despite it's faults, it works, and it works very well. If you have a good PC and like shooters or RPGs, I would highly recommend you pick this up. It is a fantastic, unique experience you won't soon forget.

And now, some appropriate music:


-Breakfastman out.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Movie Time: Prince of Darkness

Movie time with Breakfastman: Prince of Darkness.

I love John Carpenter, I really do. The guy has directed many great movies, multiple of which top my favorite movies of all time list. The Thing, Halloween, Big Trouble in Little China, In the Mouth of Madness, Assault on Precinct 13, Escape from New York... The list just goes on and on. He has had a massive influence in the realm of horror. He basically created the slasher film as we know it with Halloween. He is one of the few directors to successfully bring Lovecraftian horror to film with such classics as The Thing and the very underrated In the Mouth of Madness. Unfortunately, the man has also had more than his share of flops. While there were some bad ones early in his career (The Fog and Christine), thing got really bad for him in the 90's. Only one of the five movies (Vampires) released in that period ended up being a financial success, and every single film during that period ended being critically panned (while some, like Escape from L.A. and In the Mouth of Madness didn't deserve it). The movie I am looking at today, Prince of Darkness, was released in 1987, and was critically panned all 'round. Did it deserve the critical beating it got, like The Fog, it is it actually an underrated gem, like In the Mouth of madness? Let's dig in to find out.

                           Ladies and Gentlemen: Our villian. No wait, don't go! The review hasn't even started yet!
 
The film starts out with Dr.Loomis Donald Pleasence's character, a priest, visiting the bed of a priest who recently died. In the room, Pleasence finds a chest containing a key to the basement of an abandoned church. Pleasence, naturally curious about what is behind the door, decides to take a look. After going downstairs, he finds himself in a large, ancient looking room. In the middle of the room is a book on a stand and a large cylinder full of a strange, swirling green liquid. The book in front is no help, because it is apparently written in many different languages, sometimes switching languages in the same sentence. His curiosity piqued, he invites a number of people from a nearby college, including chemists, archaeologists, linguists, and physicists to investigate what exactly the green liquid is. Among them is Egg Shen Victor Wong, playing a physics professor, and Jameson Parker, sporting a sweet porn 'stache and playing a physics student. Also, Alice Cooper makes an appearance as a zombie hobo. After everything gets set up and they start to decode the book, they find out that the green goop in the cylinder is apparently the Devil or God or  or something equally odd along those lines (the film never really gives a good explanation as to what it is). Apparently it was sealed away in the cylinder 7 million years ago by it's father, which may or may not be God. Anti-matter and time traveling dreams are also involved somehow. Of course, things get messy, crap hits the fan, and people start dieing and getting possessed by the thing. The goop is trying to free it's father, which will bring about the end of the world, and our plucky heroes have to stop it.

          Um... Lady, I think something is wrong with your face. Did you take a bath in lye or something?

From the above description, you think the film might take a more Lovecraftian approach to horror. Very subtle, with a focus more on building atmosphere and a horror of the unknown. You would be wrong, for the most part. The movie shares more in common with your common zombie flick than anything else. The green goop takes control of an army of bums, which it uses for nefarious ends. It also sprays people with itself, taking over their bodies, and can posses the bodies of those who have already died. The film actually concentrates more on the zombies and their escapades than building any horror with the green goop. Honestly, that is probably the film's biggest flaw right there. The idea itself is rather silly, but it had promise to be scary. By concentrating on the zombies the film never takes advantage of the interesting possibilities at instilling fear in the viewer afforded by it's most interesting idea (the green goop being an ancient, evil entity). Also, to compound the problems further the film just isn't all that scary. There were only one or two actually frightening scenes (those scenes being a part in the film where a dead character comes back to reveal that he is crawling with beetles, before falling apart, and when another formerly dead character stares in a mirror, giggling to himself). This isn't necessarily a bad thing for a horror film (I was never really scared by either Dawn of the Dead, Session 9, or Phantasm, and I enjoyed all of them in spite of that), but it certainly isn't something to be proud of either. Honestly if you are going to create a horror film that isn't scary, you need something to distract the user from that, whether that is an interesting and unusual message (Dawn of the Dead's anti-consumerism angle), a fascinating mystery (Session 9's killer), or just ball's out crazy weirdness (pretty much all of Phantasm). If you don't the film really suffers for it.

                                              I wonder if he has a shotgun under that trench coat?
     
The acting in the film is fairly decent all round. Donald Pleasence and Victor Wong provide the best performances, but the other actor aren't that bad either. The cinematography and direction are both great, and the score is typical Carpenter (KEYBOARD ALL THE MUSIC!) which isn't a bad thing. The writing is fairly good and all the the characters pretty much act believably, which is always a plus in my book. Beyond that, their really isn't much else I can say. Everything works except for the horror aspect of the film.

                            "Woah, lookit down there! Alice Cooper just impaled a guy with a bicycle! Awesome!"



TL;DR: Prince of Darkness is a serviceable movie. It isn't terrible (it was certainly better than The Fog), but it isn't really that good either. It has an interesting premise, but nearly ruins it by concentrating on all the wrong things, in addition to the fact that it really just isn't all that frightening. If you are a horror fan, look to some of Carpenter's other films. This one really isn't all that good. Play me out Ozzy!

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Movie Time: Cowboys & Aliens

So, I saw Cowboys and Aliens last night. I guess I gotta review it now...


Movie time with Breakfastman: Cowboys & Aliens.


So... Cowboys & Aliens, eh? I know a lot of people were looking forward to this one. Truth be told, once I saw the first trailer, I wasn't. It looked too serious, when something with a title like "Cowboys & Aliens" seemed like it should be incredibly campy. Unfortunately, we never got a campy movie about Cowboys & Aliens. We got a serious movie about Cowboys & Aliens instead. To be perfectly honest though, it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be.

                                               Wow, the new season of Two & a Half men is weird.

The story is fairly predictable. The movie starts with Daniel Craig waking in the middle of nowhere, wearing only an undershirt, suspenders, and a strange mechanical bracelet thingy on his arm. He is also apparently wounded, but what wounded him and why remains a mystery. He meets up with a delightful group of bounty hunters who, seeing him shot and with what looks to be part of a handcuff on his wrist, assume he is a wanted criminal (which is a better guess than you might think) and try to take him in. This doesn't go so well, as he proceeds to kill all of them. He takes their clothes and guns guns, steals one of their horses, and rides it however many miles to the nearest town. There he meets up with a preacher who fixes his wound, puts the son of a young cattle-baron in his place, and promptly gets arrested. When his being put on the stagecoach to Santa Fe, Aliens attack the town, capturing a large number of the population. Local cattle baron Harrison Ford does not stand this, and rounds up a posse of the remaining townsfolk to find the missing people. Daniel Craig and some women who kind of looks like a female Robert Z'dar and with knowledge of Craig's past, decide to tag along as well. Things go pretty much as you expect from there. More aliens attack, they encounter Indians, and blow up the alien mother ship. Overall, the writing is fairly decent. There are some fairly obvious plot holes here and there, but they didn't stop me from enjoying the movie.

                                            Great American heroes, or greatest American heroes?

The special effects and action sequences hold up nicely too. Everything is well choreographed and looks fine. You can actually tell what is going on, which is a big plus. Lots of lasers, people getting torn apart by alien-gorilla things, alien-gorilla thing getting there skulls caved in by shotgun blasts. The aliens themselves look great. They have a pretty unique design (a chest cavity that opens to reveal two fleshy, moist arms? Awesome!) and do what they are supposed to do (kill people and generally look menacing) well.

                                                         Like a deer caught in the headlights.


The acting isn't even half bad either. Harrison Ford has probably the most memorable performance and the best character in the entire movie as Woodrow Dolarhyde, a crotchety old cattle baron who doesn't take crap from anyone and never gives up. Daniel Craig, on the other hand, doesn't give as strong of a performance. His character seems rather lifeless and emotionless. That could just be the writing, but to be honest, Daniel Craig doesn't seem to do much with what he is given either. The performances from most of the other people involved are solid as well, but nothing particularly special.

                                          Craig and Fords' reaction to the Rotten Tomatoes page for the movie.


TL;DR: There are worse ways to spend $10 dollars at the movies this summer, but there are also better too. While the movie is pretty decent, it doesn't really stand out. If you want to see cowboys fighting aliens, you will get plenty of that, but that is pretty much it.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

So... A blog, eh? Whatever shall I do with all my newfound power?

So... Since I am doing nothing else of any import in what will probably be my last summer vacation, I decided to make a blog to talk about stuff. Pretty boring, huh? Anyway, I will probably use this as a soapbox to ramble and rant about random topics. I might also post reviews of whatever I last played/watched. So... Stay tuned I suppose. Just got Catherine and Dead Rising 2 today, so I might review those a little later on. I also have a pile of movies I have not yet watched, so I will probably review those whenever I get to them.

Until next time good reader (if anyone is reading this, which I doubt anyone is), try not to die, and I will see you soon, I hope.
-Breakfastman.